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Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Is a Woman's Fascination with Snakes little more than Penis Envy

WHY DID MY BOY FRIEND LEAVE?
JUST SO HAPPENS I LIKE BIG ONES
HE KEEPS THE LITTLE ONES AWAY
CUTE LITTLE FELLOW
WHAT'S HE DOING WITH HIS TAIL?
YOU KNOW I'M EVIL!

                                              On her way to work one morning, down the path along side the lake 
                                              A tender hearted woman saw a poor half frozen snake 
                                              His pretty colored skin had been all frosted with the dew 
                                              "Oh well", she cried, "I'll take you in and I'll take care of you" 
                                              "Take me in oh tender woman, take me in, for heaven's sake 
                                               Take me in oh tender woman", sighed the snake 

                                               She wrapped him up all cozy in a curvature of silk 
                                               And then laid him by the fireside with some honey and some milk 
                                               Now she hurried home from work that night as soon as she arrived 
                                               She found that pretty snake she'd taking in had been revived 
                                               "Take me in, oh tender woman, take me in, for heaven's sake 
                                               Take me in oh tender woman", sighed the snake 

                                               Now she clutched him to her bosom, "You're so beautiful", she cried 
                                               "But if I hadn't brought you in by now you might have died" 
                                               Now she stroked his pretty skin and then she kissed and held him tight 
                                               But instead of saying thanks, that snake gave her a vicious bite 
                                               "Take me in, oh tender woman, take me in, for heaven's sake 
                                               Take me in oh tender woman", sighed the snake 

                                              "I saved you", cried that woman "And you've bit me even, why? 
                                              You know your bite is poisonous and now I'm going to die" 
                                              "Oh shut up, silly woman" said the reptile with a grin 
                                              "You knew damn well I was a snake before you took me in 
                                              "Take me in, oh tender woman, take me in, for heaven's sake 
                                              Take me in oh tender woman", sighed the snake 
OMG WHAT'S HE TRYING TO DO!
SHE CAN'T KEEP A BOY FRIEND
IS HE TRYING TO MATE WITH HER TONGUE?
I'M WEARING MY SNAKE!
WITH THIS YOU DON'T NEED BATTERIES
STORY AS OLD AS TIME
I SAID, NOT TONIGHT
LESBIANS WON'T LET A SNAKE COME BETWEEN THEM

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