HEADS OF STATE FROM ACROSS THE WORLD HAVE GATHERED FOR THE FIRST CLIMATE CHANGE FLAT EARTH SUMMIT IN PARIS. LEADING SCIENTIST AT THE SUMMIT DECLARED THAT GLOBAL WARMING FLAT EARTH SCIENCE WAS A SETTLED ISSUE. THOSE FEW WHO DARED DEFY THIS WERE UNABLE TO EXPLAIN THE RISING NUMBERS OF SHIPS LOST AT SEA CAUSED BY INCREASED ACTIVITY OF SHIPS ATTEMPTING TO SAIL INTO UNKNOWN WATERS. WORLD LEADERS ARE CALLING FOR A BAN ON ALL SUCH MARINE TRAFFIC INTO UNCHARTED WATERS IN ORDER TO PROTECT THE FLEETS OF ALL PARTICIPATING COUNTRIES. THIS ACTION WAS DEEMED NECESSARY TO ENSURE THE CONTINUED PROSPERITY OF ALL STATES ATTENDING THE SUMMIT. DURING HIS CLOSING ADDRESS PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA KING CHARLES VI OF FRANCE SAID THESE RESTRICTIONS ON CARBON EMISSIONS MARITIME TRAVEL WERE ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY FOR THE FUTURE OF LIFE AS WE KNOW IT.
THE ABOVE PIECE OF SATIRE IS JUST POKING FUN AT THE RADICAL GLOBAL WARMING ALARMIST MOVEMENT THAT HAS TAKEN ROOT IN THE PROGRESSIVE LEFT AND ON UNIVERSITY CAMPUSES ACROSS THE NATION. THEY GLEEFULLY POINT OUT THAT MOST SCIENTIST HAVE ADOPTED THEIR POSITION THAT THE EARTH IS OVER-HEATING AND THAT MAN IS THE CAUSE. HOWEVER, IT SHOULD BE POINTED OUT THAT IN THE DAYS OF CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS THE FOREMOST SCIENTIST OF THAT PERIOD INSISTED THEIR STUDIES AND MEASUREMENTS PROVED THE WORLD WAS FLAT AND THOSE WHO FAILED TO ACCEPT THEIR THEORY WERE IN FACT "ROUND WORLDERS"! LITTLE MORE THAN NUMB-MINDED KNUCKLE-DRAGGING NEANDERTHALS WHO IF ALLOWED TO CONTINUE WOULD BE RESPONSIBLE FOR APOCALYPTIC DESTRUCTION ON A GRAND SCALE WITH EVEN THE GREAT OCEANS FLOWING INTO THE ENDLESS VOID OF SPACE.
And for those that are keenly aware that the earth is in reality actually warming due to natural ecological changes brought on by invisible hand of the Master and not by man I leave you with conclusive proof that it's getting hotter----these scantly clad cuties:
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